Basically, your date views you like an app that’s in beta.

Maybe you’re pretty great with a lot of promise and the potential to make someone millions, but that doesn’t mean your date wants to actually download you.

However, none of the maybe 30 men surrounding us were eager to start a conversation," Erika, who lives in nearby San Jose, told men, such a scene would be wholly unfamiliar.

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Okay, maybe when you’re together you’ll actually make eye contact and have real conversation, but there will be no phone calls or emails until months -- years! Instead, it’ll be more of a, “Hey, wanna grab a drink after work” type of thing and then you’ll Uber there separately and have to awkwardly find each other in the bar and depending on how it goes, maybe get food after a couple of drinks, and then Uber home separately, and yes he is 100% leaving you alone on the sidewalk if his Uber shows up first. ): a large majority of them are still paying for the first date.

No one's getting picked up and dropped off at their house for the “date” and there isn't an implied commitment for dinner.

Okay, maybe no one actually was moving, but bachelorettes all over the country were joking about relocating to Juneau or Sitka because, according to those morning show polls, that's where all the men were.

Well, now that distinction seems to have been bestowed upon Silicon Valley.

Most of the men went to Ivy League schools, are ambitious, and came out here because it's the mecca of the tech world. A lot of people in the Valley have started meeting people through salsa dancing — it's really big — and so much social awkwardness comes up. They act like, "Oh my goodness, there is a woman who I'm touching." They get super nervous.

There's a great mix of guys from all over world, and there are interesting types of people to meet. I don't think a lot of guys even interact with women on a consistent basis. It makes it difficult to date someone who doesn't even know how to act in a social context; it's just frustrating. He told me all these things that you wouldn't ever disclose on a first date.If you always hang out with the same three people, or only hang out at tech events, it will probably be hard to find someone.But if you have a wider circle, or have hobbies with a good gender balance, dating will be a lot easier. (Last year, it had the highest ratio of single guys to single women in the country.) And I'm not going to pretend it didn't hold sway in my decision to move here from Manhattan eight months ago. After all, I've never been much into jocks and always would rather date a dude in a hoodie than one in a pinstripe suit.Plus, as a former New Yorker with a strong sense of style, I thought to myself, I would have the upper hand. While there are a lot of attractive options out here who match my type—smart, dark, slightly scruffy, maybe wearing glasses and a decent pair of jeans—very few of them seem to know how to make eye contact with a girl, even fewer know how to talk to her. Here is how: The odds are good, but the goods are odd.The guys in San Francisco, not ALL of them, but a LOT of them, don’t open doors, walk on the proper side of the sidewalk, or stand up when the woman gets up from the table.