] Just because I'm telling you this story doesn't mean I'm alive at the end of it. See more » There are many bad things about this movie, but let's list the good things first. It's nicely shot, and the beach looked pretty. I guess John Travolta looked as though he was having fun? The furniture was more interesting than he was, and had more emotional range.

This could all be pre-recorded and I could be talking to you from the bottom of the ocean. Which is more than I could say for the poor buggers who had to sit through this mess. Even he's better than Johnson, a black hole of tedium from which nothing interesting can escape.

Chon and Ben refuse the deal and the leader of the cartel Elena sends her right-arm in America, Lado, to abduct Ophelia to press the American drug dealers.

My guess is that Hispanics enjoy it more, specially adults, who even clap at the end of the movie.

Maybe I missed some of the jokes in the translation, because0 other people was laughing more than I did. Do not expect the typical Hollywood movie, in which all is just action, or just jokes, or just a one thing during the whole movie.

To figure out where the gender ratio is most skewed in each direction, we went right to the data.

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C., women often complain about the lack of available men.

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Chon and Ben share the pothead lover Ophelia and she loves both of them since they complete each other - Chon is a powerful and strong lover and Ben is a sensible and loving lover.

Their comfortable life changes when the Mexican Baja Cartel demands a partnership in their business.

Your two leads, ladies and gentlemen, are Aaron Johnson, last seen being upstaged by a preteen girl, and Taylor Kitsch, who Hollywood keeps casting as the lead in blockbusters which then tank spectacularly at the box office. These are two of the blandest leads I've ever seen, and I've seen movies that starred rappers.