Every day I wake up thrilled that people pay me to do the thing I love.

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I guess my life is kind of like an episode of the Muppet show and I would be gonzo: always on a new quest, pushing my imagination to the limits, and occasionally walking into things.

If your favorite Muppet is Miss Piggy, there is a good chance that we just won’t get along.

Learn how to avoid the mistakes made by 90 percent of searchers and create a profile that captures your strong points and stands out from the crowd.

Every word counts in your opener, including your user name. Your dating "handle" should be anonymous yet descriptive. You might want to zero in on an activity or interest, like I did with my online ID, Golf Nut.

Don’t take that the wrong way; she just really annoys me.

I guess the woman that I am looking for is somewhere between a thrill-seeker and a couch potato.

Mistake #1: You Don't Self-Promote You might be hesitant to really play up your assets because you worry it will make you seem cocky or self-involved.

But leaving out interesting info, like how you're awesome at snowboarding or speak two languages, results in a lackluster first impression.

Another trick is to pretend it's a job you're trying to get, not a date, since women tend to find it easier to really sell themselves in a work setting.

Mistake #2: You Come Off as a Clone Everyone knows you are "nice, smart, fun, and sweet," but there are thousands of other single girls online saying the same damn thing about themselves. The snag-him secret: The best profiles tell an original story.

Smiley face emojis work unexpectedly well online - indeed, according to Match's latest survey, people who use emojis end up having more sex.